The nurse said it was helpful if the spouse went to the Cardiac Rehabilitation Orientation with the client. So, on Tuesday, I happily went with Jon to his Orientation. I got the feeling they wanted to see what kind of support Jon was getting at home. I imagine it helps them get to know their clients a little better. I have to admit I zoned out a bit on the part where the coordinator, Patty, was giving her standard speech about what to expect, but otherwise we had as good a time as can be expected. And in addition to my learning what Jon would be doing for one hour, three times a week at Cardiac Rehabilitation, I got to express my opinions about how I felt about it. That is, I had the opportunity to let Patty know that I believed it was an important part of Jon’s healing (important for him of course, this isn’t about me) that he could start cooking again.
I mean, sure I miss the days when Jon used to kick me out of the kitchen. And it was really nice when I got out of the shower in the morning and all I had to do was make myself a cup of tea to accompany the already made breakfast. And I fondly remember the tinkle of Jon’s text messages while I was working, alerting me that lunch was ready. And who wouldn’t miss coming in from the studio, after a full day of work, at tasty and healthy dinner already on my plate ready to eaten, just at I was beginning to feel faint from hunger.
But really, I wasn’t thinking about me when I made this suggestion to Patty. I was thinking how good it would be for Jon, how much better it would make him feel, to really start getting back to normal. Doing those things he really loves to do….like cook.
And I must admit that Jon has been easing back into it, a dinner here a lunch there. And it wasn’t really good for him to be lifting the big pot filled with water to cook the corn. But ultimately, I’m thinking of old normal, not new normal when it comes to cooking. The kind of normal where Jon cooks all the meals (not some or few) and I wash the dishes afterwards.
Now I understand this is going to take time, I guess I just want to make sure we don’t just fall into some new habits (like me cooking) and forget how things used to be. So, in ten years, I’m not saying things like “When we first got married……..”
So you can imagine how thrilled I was today when I heard Simon braying and looked out my studio window and there was Jon, shucking corn (something he was not allowed to do a few weeks ago) and feeding the husks to the donkeys. Because this could only mean one thing. Jon was making lunch. Which makes me a believer in Cardiac Rehabilitation and the idea that dreams really do come true.
Oh Maria, This is so touching and sweet and funny!! And as someone who loves to cook healthy meals for appreciative people, I agree that JON needs to cook for you as part of his rehabilitation! Just having the flu last winter and not being able to get out of the chair to make so much as a sandwich made me feel so HELPLESS and USELESS!! So as much as you love having Jon cook, he needs to cook for you that much also! Annie
That’s just it Annie, you get my concerns for Jon and cooking.
No need for pan of water….place two ears in microwave, unshucked, for 4. Minutes..take out and cut off stem with sharp knife and the ear falls out of the husk perfectly cooked. Just learned this two months ago and it works,great.
“This isn’t about me” — of course it’s not. I’m in awe of your selflessness, so willing to make room for Jon in the kitchen, when we all know how you love to cook. Your sacrifice will not go unnoticed. ;-}
Laughing out loud!
…and we are the other way about.
After I had a major heart attack, caused by a bacterial infection 6 years ago, my husband took over the cooking. I tell him that I fell in love with him in 1976 when we had two unknown foreign visitors from Germany coming to stay and our gas was turned off because of a leak–it was a Saturday of course so no repairs until Monday. I had not known Craig for more than a few months but he turned up with a huge pan of steaming hot enchiladas with rice and beans, for xix and enough for two helpings–guests, us and my two children.
Nw we are back to me cooking and him dish-washing and both of us very happy to do it this way. Look after each other and enjoy life whatever it brings..
Oh you’re a better woman than I am Erika. Maybe someday…..
You can always fill a pot by setting it on the stove and filling it a quart at a time. No heavy lifting that way. It can be emptied the same way once the pot has cooled off. Figured that out when I still had canning to finish and a bad back was preventing me from lifting.
Great advice Sheila. Why didn’t I think of that!
I love this piece Maria!
What a super attitude!
Love to you both,
From Fran
Well…in the interest of honesty I have to say that I love to cook. It’s my wordless way of saying “I love you” to Craig. Also He does 75% of the house cleaning while I drift around with swiffer mop and duster between whiles. I do do the laundry.
He will be having a knee replacement one of these days fairly soon and then I’ll be back to a lot more of the laborious stuff.
The back and forth of life Erika, change and more change…
Not to fill up your blog but I have to share this with you: Shortly after we married Craig was ironing his shirts and he looked up with a heavy sigh and said “If you hadn’t been married before you would be ironing my shirts!” (How true, how true) Now neither of us would be caught dead ironing anything.
Once again we see that dreams really do come true. I’m happy for you (and Jon) and can so identify with every single word you wrote! We princesses are few, but we’re worth everything we get. Self-indulgent? Narcissistic? Hardly. We deserve it all… 🙂
In 2010,I had a heart attack and stroke. Another a year later and still they haven’t found any blockages. Go figure! Any way, my recover included a DVD I nearly wore out playing it so much. About a man with a Border collie that climbed into his shower, My Mattie girl has done the same thing, scaring my silly! She totaled a pillow of mine while I was in the hospital. As soon as I was able, I found out this Jon Katz had serval books out and got them ordered so I could behave myself after my mornings of cariac rehab. I was usually exhausted anda good read was really welcome! And I found out about the blog and yours. You and Jon have been a part of my recoveries from several more hospitalizations and grief from the death of my daughter. Thank you both so much for sharing your lives with us!
I’m realizing we’re all on this healing journey together Chip. It’s nice to know you’re there. Best to you.