Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category

The Other Side Of The Bells

Saturday, September 20th, 2014

hensAll day I watch the chickens from my window
Eating their way across the yard, then back again and back again….

They cock their heads to the music coming from my studio.

The sound of bells
Vibrations that resonate
with every living thing on the Earth.

They seem to be listening
or hearing, at least

They seem to look in my window
Can they see me
do they know I’m here
on the other side of the bells.

Two Lacy White Vintage Hankie Scarves For Sale

Friday, September 19th, 2014
Lacey white scarf #1

Lacy white scarf #1

The last time I made some Vintage Hankie Scarves there was a lot of interest in the Lacy White one I made.  So I pulled out a bunch of my lacy white vintage hankies and made a few more scarves.  I have two for sale today.

If you’ve been looking for a Lacy White Vintage Hankie Scarf, just let me know.  They are $45 + $7 shipping.  Just email me here at  I take checks or paypal.

Lacy White Scarf #2

Lacy White Scarf #2

A Day of Warmth and Creativity

Thursday, September 18th, 2014
Kim McMillan's new Fall Purse.

Kim McMillan’s new Fall Purse.

Fall is my favorite time of year, Kim told me.  She said she was trying to capture the feeling of movement, of the leaves falling, in her new felted purse.  I’m taken with the colors and textures, the delicacy and boldness and how they all work so well together.

I went to Kim’s house to pick up my latest batch of potholders, most of them for the Open House.  Although Kim was the only one home (besides her old, blind, white Lab, Alex and their newly arrived Halloween black cat, Blackie) I could feel the swirl of creativity as I sat down at her dining room table.  Jars or homemade salsa took up one table and more tomatoes were roasting in the oven.

Kim's Salsa, one of which I was fortunate enough to take home

Kim’s Salsa, one of which I was fortunate enough to take home

First she showed me her autumn purse then came back from the living room with the one she’s working on now.  This one is black and white and  designed around a single button she got at Jack’s Outback, an antique shop in town.  She pointed out the free-hand stitching and said the black and white button is special enough to stand on its own.  Some buttons, she said, were fillers and some were just Special.  She’ll be selling her felted purses at the Saving Simon Open House in October.

Kim's new black and white felted purse being made.

Kim’s new black and white felted purse, in the making.

I volunteered at the Cambridge Co-op today and never got into my studio.  But because of both Kathleen and Kim and their beautiful work,  my day was filled with warmth, good energy and creativity.



Spreading Good Energy,Kathleen Nohe’s Wrapped Stones at the Bedlam Farm Open House

Thursday, September 18th, 2014
Kathleen's Wrapped Stones

Kathleen’s box of  Wrapped Stones accompanied by a bag of lavender

Yesterday I picked up a box from the post office.  Usually I’m excited to get a package in the mail, but yesterday the idea of a package just overwhelmed me.  So I put it in the pile of stuff on our dining room table.  When  I woke this morning at 5am the first thing that came to my mind was the package.  Something sparked inside of me and I realized it was from Kathleen Nohe.  Now I couldn’t wait to open it.

A few months ago I received an envelope in the mail from Kathleen.  Inside were three stones different stones wrapped in silver wire.  It’s something I do for my own enjoyment Kathleen wrote.  I’m a dental technician and when business is slow I make my wrapped stones.  Of course there’s more to Kathleen and her wrapped stones than that.  She’s also an energy worker and Tai Chi instructor.  Each of Kathleen’s  necklaces emanate the healing properties of the stone, as well as the caring  and loving energy Kathleen puts into each one as she makes her creative decisions.

Kathleen asked me to give one of the three stones to Jon, but I must admit, I’ve hoarded them all for myself.  A black stone, a green one and yellow and lavender quartz.  I choose which one feels right in the morning and slip it around my neck.

But as selfish as I was with what Kathleen sent me, I really did want to share her stones.  So I asked her if she would be willing to make some for me to sell at the October Bedlam Farm Open House.  And that’s what was in the package on my dining room table.  A beautiful box filled with Kathleen’s Wrapped Stones.  Each in its own little bag, a stone hanging from a leather cord adorned with silver spirals and flowers.

Yesterdays fear and panic faded as I picked up each necklace ohhing and ahhing over it.  This is what it’s about I thought. This is what’s real.   Creating, sharing, sending our good messages out into the world.  Being in fear has nothing on the feeling of excitement and joy I felt thinking of all the people who would be touched by Kathleen’s creativity and good energy.

Wrapped Stones

A few of Kathleen’s Wrapped Stones

So if you’re coming to the Saving Simon  Open House in October, you’ll have the chance to buy one of Kathleen’s Wrapped Stones.  And I’ll be happy to sell whatever is still available on my site after the Open House, but you can also get in touch with Kathleen directly at

In Kathleen’s note that came with her necklaces she wrote, ” I hope the necklaces find homes and spread good energy around.”  I have not doubt they will.

Panic Attack

Wednesday, September 17th, 2014
Mrs. Pam's Quilt

Tacking “Mrs. Pam’s Quilt”

Early this morning I woke up in terror.  I haven’t had a 3 am terror in months and this one was worse than any I can remember having in a long time.  My fear was very specific. I woke terrified of the thought that I might be suddenly  paralyzed by a disease or an accident.  Maybe it came from a nightmare I had but didn’t remember, I don’t know where else it would have come from. And it felt as rational a fear to have as if it had already happened to me.

Once the initial panic was gone I laid in bed trying all the techniques I’ve used in the past when I wake in fear.  Telling myself it isn’t real, meditating on my center and picturing alligator, a symbol or strength for me.  I even tried talking to the “little girl” inside of me, the frightened one.  But when I did, I couldn’t offer her any comfort, I couldn’t separate her from me.  Talking to Jon always helps, but he was sleeping so soundly, which he rarely does, I didn’t want to wake him.  Eventually I got up and went into the living room to read.  Soon after that Jon woke up and we talked till I was able to fall back to sleep.

In the morning, the fear was gone, but I was feeling vulnerable and sensitive, bruised from what was  obviously a panic attack.  I’m still not sure what brought it on, but it felt old, a deep and buried pain surfacing in my subconscious.  During the day I did what I could to try and understand it all.  I talked to Jon and a good friend, meditated and worked on my quilt.  By the end of the day, I had some ideas what could have been the trigger for the panic attack, but it was still unclear and I had the urge to give into the exhaustion I was feeling and go to bed after dinner.  And I think it would have been fine if I did that, but instead I chose to go back to my studio and do some more work.  Because  work almost always makes me feel better.  And my warm, brightly lit studio felt like a safe and inviting place for me just then.

So I still have no answers, but I did what I could to get myself to a better place today and I know tomorrow I’ll wake up feeling even better, maybe all better.  My anxiety and the panic attacks are a part of who I am. They come less frequently than at any other time in my life and when they do I’m pretty good at dealing with them.  And I know, like nightmares, they brings gifts of awareness if I can see through the fear.  I also know it’s a continuing process and I’m living it.

Joy Beyond The Skies

Tuesday, September 16th, 2014
"Shawna Makes It Glow"

“Shawna Makes It Glow”

There’s a woman whose name means both “God is gracious” and “Sexy Woman”.  She’s wearing a Thunderbird mask, a powerful Native American symbol that brings both lightening and wind.   Instead of the traditional geometric designs in the wings of the Thunderbird, there are everyday things, the stuff you see when you look around your home.  That was my dream.  I took that dream and made it into this wall hanging.  But to make it work, to make it speak of what the dream was saying, I added some images and words that I got from the cemetery in Provincetown.  I don’t understand how these two came together to make this piece whole, but they did.

The rising/setting sun is an image I took from the headstone of Emeline, who died in 1811.   Then I used the words  from Cordelia’s headstone who died in 1825.  I took just a few of them from the whole: This soul we trust has fled to joys beyond the skies.  Both the image and words seemed so loving and hopeful to me.

Shawna Makes It Glow, speaks  of the divine feminine in all of us, female and male.  The one who creates and nourishes life. She knows that our passions are to be embraced.  That our desires and passions are what make us human.  And when we follow them we are being our authentic selves. My passion to create has burned in me my whole life.  It wasn’t until I embraced it, till I gave myself over to it that I was truly fulfilled.  And when we do for ourselves, we do for others.  As when we do for others, we do for ourselves.

Shawna Makes It Glow is for sale. Sold  It measures  about 27″ x 32″ and is $125 + $10 shipping.  If it speaks to you and you’d like it to be yours, just let me know here at   I take checks or paypal.





Shawna Makes it Glow

Monday, September 15th, 2014

shawna a makes it glow

A while ago I had a dream of a woman wearing a Native American bird mask that seemed to be lit from within. Inside the bird wings were ordinary things that you might find in your home.   A woman who was standing next to the woman in the mask said “Shawna makes it glow”.  I did a drawing of the dream at the time, knowing I would come back to it.

So this is where I’m with it so far.  I’m going to use the words from the dream and maybe some other words too, but I’m not sure where they’ll go or how else I’ll finish the piece off.

shawna a makes it glow detail

Whale Watching with my feet on the ground

Sunday, September 14th, 2014
"Spirit" in the foreground

That’s my Spirit in the front and her son Solstice right behind her.

I didn’t tell Jon until after we were married.  Then one day, (it must have been in January when I got my yearly Whale Museum Renewal letter ) I showed him a picture of my adopted killer whale Spirit.  It’s actually a picture of Spirit’s fin, that’s how they’re identified and kept track of.  About 20 years ago Spirit was given to me as a Christmas gift from a co-worker and every year after that I paid my yearly dues to the Whale Museum and received information  and occasionally a new photo of Spirit.  Jon was dubious about the legitimacy of the whole thing and had a good time teasing me about Spirit (saying things like, you know they kill seals)  but I didn’t waver and put her photo up on the refrigerator, where it still hangs.

It was also after we were already married, that I learned of Jon’s feelings about whales, which come completely from his few experiences with whale watching off of Provincetown.  Basically he sees whales as  big, wet, floating sofa’s.  I found his views heretical and shocking (I never even imagined someone who wouldn’t be awed by seeing a whale) and really funny.   So, I continued to pay my yearly Whale Museum dues and updated Jon (smirking though he was) whenever I got news of Spirit.

Then, to my delight and surprise, Jon suggested we go on a Whale Watch during our vacation in Provincetown.   I was up for it and excited about it.  Jon even got some pills for sea sickness.  Our first day in Provincetown we checked out the Whale Watching tours and Jon was ready to make reservations for the next day.  But I suggested we wait and see how the weather was, just to be sure.  Because I realized, as we stood there looking at the videos of whales jumping out of the water on the screen behind the lady taking reservations, and thinking about spending three and a half hours on a boat,  that my head was starting to spin and my stomach was getting queasy.

So, putting the whale watch off for the moment,  we walked down the pier and came upon The Hindu.  A beautiful wooden boat built in 1925 with big sails and a shiny mast.  Jon’s face lit up at the idea of a two hour full moon cruise which didn’t leave the bay and didn’t go out if the water was rough.  I thought it the perfect test run for the Whale Watch.

And it was.  The full moon cruise was canceled so we went on a sunset cruise instead.  The sky turned pink  and orange and a strange green color.  The water was calm and it was neat to see the guys working on the boat pull the sails up and coil the ropes.  But I’d say it went on for about an hour more than it needed to.  Not only was is kinda boring, but I started to get that queasy feeling again.  I wasn’t really seasick, but it was similar to the feeling I get when I’m on a plane.  I just like to have my feet on the ground.

So, to Jon’s delight,  I passed on the Whale Watch.  Maybe next time we’re in Provincetown I’ll be up for it.  Or maybe I’ll just watch some whale videos on YouTube and gaze at my photo of Spirit on the fridge and pretend.


Self Portrait with Jon and TV

Saturday, September 13th, 2014
Self Portrait with Jon in motel TV

Self Portrait with Jon (and umbrella?) in motel TV

The Sun and Moon Divide The Sky

Saturday, September 13th, 2014


Footsteps in the full moon,
walking on my grave.

Pain and sickness turn to light as days dissolve and nights conform

Still, flowers bloom without my eye
and the sun and moon divide the sky.


I’ve been to many cemeteries around the country and have explored lots of the early ones inhabited  by  English Settlers, but I’ve never been as moved as I was in the Winthrop Street Cemetery in Provincetown.  Partially it’s because so much of the carved writing and images are still clear and legible.  Also,  the  tall, unkept grasses and hilly, sandy paths winding through the headstones gave me the feeling of discovery as well as having a romantic atmosphere.  But it was the poetry and sentiments carved on the headstones that kept me engaged and made me want to go back the next day to see more.

It was after visiting that cemetery that I did this simple drawing and wrote the words beside it.