Jon and George, The Lost Twins

April 13th, 2014

jon and george 1

Sometimes Jon and George are standing next to each other and the energy between them is palpable.  There’s a connection so strong and gentle it makes me think of the love between brothers that I’ve never seen but have read about. The lost twin finally found.

And sometimes it’s like they’re the same person from different universes or planes of existence that have somehow come together.  I wouldn’t doubt that Georges Ginofor Gallery is a portal of sorts that allows such things to occur. I’m certain magic happens there and that George is only privy to some of it.

jon and george 2 (1)

Bedlam Back Porch

April 11th, 2014

minnie and flo2

The last couple of days have been warm enough for the ticks to come out.  I pulled six or seven of them off me after going for a walk in the woods with Lenore this afternoon.

But the warm weather also means the cats actually want to be outside.  Today Minnie sat by the rocker and when I came out of the house started meowing her cigarette meow.  I guess we’re getting to know each other pretty well.  I scooped her up and put her on the rocker.  She stopped making noise and settled in.

When I came back from Glens Falls, where I picked up the free motion spring foot for my new machine, Flo as warming herself on the slate porch.  Soon the gray hen wandered over and Flo moved to the other rocker.  Unlike Minnie, Flo doesn’t think she a chicken.  Flo knows she’s the queen.

Peaceable Bedlam Quilt

April 11th, 2014

pb 2

Somewhere in between rushing Jon to the airport,  starting and finishing a Juice Fast, buying my new sewing machine and have a major panic attack about buying my new sewing machine, I designed Susan’s Peaceable Bedlam Quilt.  I couldn’t tell you when I did it but when I walked into my studio this morning and looked at it on my floor, I was happy with it.  I’m sure it will have a few changes as I start to piece it together, or may make some changes when I see it fresh on Monday.

The quilt has the four panels that I made of the animals from the farm surrounded by the fabric that Susan sent me.   The fabric and clothes came neatly folded in a box.  Each piece had a yellow post-it on it with a description like:  Gerry’s shirt, The skirt my mother made me, My brother’s shirt and These sunflowers remind me of Bedlam Farm.  I couldn’t use all the fabric Susan sent and added the red from my own shelves.  There were mostly patterns and I needed some solids to give the design some definition.

I was definitely thinking of the Gee’s Bend Quilts when I was designing this.  Especially since I’ve been reading the book and looking at the photo’s of the quilts in the evenings.  I thought of how the quilts would often have a traditional pattern that the quilter would intentionally shift either by changing an element of the design or by choice of  color.  So the balance was thrown off.  It’s those idiosyncratic decisions that always intrigue me.

Next week I’ll start sewing it together on my new machine. (fingers crossed).

Susan's skirt with the post-it note on it.

Susan’s skirt with the post-it note on it. I used both the flowered print outside and solid brown fabric liner.

Concert at Athena’s Music Sanctuary on the Weekend of the Bedlam Farm Open House

April 11th, 2014

So much has been happening, I just realized that it’s already the middle of April and the June 21st and 22nd Bedlam Farm Open House is coming up soon.  Luckily Kim is back to work and she can help me get some scarves and potholders sewn.

This year, were trying to  actively connect with the businesses in the town of Cambridge, which is just 5 minutes from the farm.  We’ll try and  let you all know what there is so see in and around town, where to eat and places to visit.

So last week Mandy and Athena and I were talking about it during our Wednesday Lunch meeting at the Round House. Mandy said she’d like offer massages and energy work.  Her office us right upstairs from the Round House and I thought it could be the perfect way to spend and hour or so in between visiting Bedlam Farm and exploring Cambridge.  I know for sure I’ll be scheduling an appointment with Mandy before the Open House to get me ready.

Then Athena said she was planning on having a concert in her Music Sanctuary, which is also right in town. (it’s were Mandy and Athena and I dance before having lunch on Wednesdays)  She’ll have two concerts one on Friday night and one on Saturday night, because she always sells out a one night concert.  I thought it would be better if Athena explained the concert herself, so I took a video of her talking about it.

We haven’t figured out all the details yet, but I’ll let you know when Athena’s tickets go on sale and how to buy them and I’ll also let you know how to contact Mandy to make appointments for that massage.



My New Sewing Machine

April 10th, 2014
My new Viking

My new Viking Sapphire Sewing Machine

Panic set in as I sat down at my new Viking Sewing Machine and tired to do some free motion sewing.  I threaded the machine at Heirloom Sewing and wound the bobbin, and watched Jackie, who owns the shop sew in a straight line.  The needle threader is more complicated than my Brother Sewing Machine but I was still impressed with all the other features.   I didn’t try to do any free motion sewing at the shop and as I sat in my studio and found the fabric hard to move across the surface of the machine, I was sure I had made a mistake.  The bed of the machine has a textured surface compared to the smooth one of my Brother and I was sure this was the problem.  I tried again and again on different settings but still the fabric didn’t move easily.

So I called Jackie, thinking I would be returning the machine, that it wasn’t what a I wanted or needed.  Jackie talked me through some of the settings and told me there was another free motion foot that I could buy that worked better than the one that came with the machine.  I told her I would come into the shop tomorrow and try the new foot and show her the problems I was having.

After getting off the phone  I told Jon what was happening and was certain I’d be taking the machine with me tomorrow to return.  But Jon could see what I couldn’t.  I was having a panic attack.  Buying the sewing machine had sent me down a dark spiral.   Too much of a good thing, I was sure I didn’t deserve the new sewing machine and was finding a way to make buying it a huge mistake.  I blamed myself for making an incompetent decision, the darkness inside of me bubbling up.  I was wrong, I was bad, I was stupid.  And this wasn’t just a bad brain, it’s a darkness that lives deep inside my body, something a juice fast can’t touch.

Jon helped me see what was happening and knowing that I was panicking I sat at the machine and figured out the settings and drew a hen.  It was different from my Brother, but not that different.  It was working.  I realized I had the machine on the wrong setting.  That’s all that was wrong.  I drew some more, the familiar pain that comes from stress under my right shoulder-blade aching.  Sometimes the thread broke, or I skipped stitches but now I knew it was the panic, not me, not the machine.  I just needed to slow down or speed up, get used the to the new foot pedal.  A cat, a hen, a flower, I wrote my name with my new sewing machine.

This is just who I am sometimes, someone who panics when they get something they really want but somewhere inside themselves don’t believe they really deserve.  Coming down from my panic I knew I wouldn’t be returning the machine.  I also know, with a little practice and getting used to it, I’ll love what it can do for my work.

Today I may not have felt the joy of getting a new sewing machine, but I know it will come.  And next time, maybe I’ll remember and can avoid or at least understand the panic a little more.

Buying My New Sewing Machine

April 10th, 2014

hankiesI quit my juice fast and now Jon and I are going to Glens Falls to get my new sewing machine.  Things are looking good.  My Kickstarter money was deposited in my bank account on Monday, thank you all, once again!   I’m bringing my old machine in for a cleaning (yesterday it was making a chug chugging noise) and hopefully, in a few hours I’ll be in my studio trying out my machine.

Winner of the CommonThread Give-a-way

April 10th, 2014
Easter Bunny by Kim Gifford

Easter Bunny by Kim Gifford

To find out if you’re the winner of The Common Thread Give-a-way, just go to Kim’s website Pugs &Pics . And congratulation——–!

And  don’t forget to come back on May 5th when it’s Jane’s turn to give something away.  See  all of Jane’s wonderful work here.   Including her  new Easter Toy, great for the basket.  A felted egg that turns into a chick (which is also a puppet)…. il_75x75.581412737_mum4 il_75x75.581298362_sx5p and back again.

And for all you people out there who love to read, you can buy Rachel Barlow’s latest short story What Happens on the Road  here for only $1.29.  It’s speaks to the relationship between parent and child and explores the question of experience verses innocence.



Blame it on the green juice

April 9th, 2014
Wood pecker tree in the woods behind the farm

Wood pecker tree in the woods behind the farm, which has nothing to do with a juice fast.

Right now, I’m thinking instead of a three day juice fast, a one day juice fast is good enough.  That would mean tomorrow morning when I get up I can have a fresh egg sandwich on Round House whole wheat bread with a fruit bowl and cup of tea.

We have books piled up all over the house and they don’t bother me a bit.  And being I’m not a librarian, I’d probably put all those books on the wrong shelf anyway.

Ok maybe I’m not making any sense, blame it on all that green juice.  My brain stopped working hours ago.


Juice Fast

April 9th, 2014
My Green Juice drink.  Spinach, Kale, Lettuce, cucumber, green apple, and  lemon.  It actually didn't make me want to gag when I drank it.

My Green Juice drink. Spinach, Kale, Lettuce, cucumber, green apple, and lemon. It actually didn’t make me want to gag when I drank it.

I love to eat, I love food, I love this way it feels to bite down on different textured foods.  Sometimes I crave something warm and mushy and sometimes cool and crispy.   For most of my life I ate emotionally.  When I was frustrated, bored, sad, mostly I was trying to fill an empty space inside of me.

Now I eat differently, because I’m different than I used to be and  because Jon cooks for me.  But one thing I’ve never seriously considered doing is fasting.  Noting about the idea of fasting appeals to me.  The thought of not being able to eat, even for a few hours,  would make me anxious.  Even the idea that, if done right, it could be healthy was not enough to make me want to do it.

Until last fall, when my chiropractor said it would be a good idea for me to do a three day juice fast.  Maybe it was the way she explained it that appealed to me.  She compared the toxins in my body (which she was somehow aware of, it’s like magic to me what she does) to the books in a library that have been returned to the front desk and are piling up.  Fasting she said is equivalent to the librarian putting the books back on the shelves.   This makes sense to me, this I can understand.  And I like the idea of gathering up all those books and putting them back where they belong.

Like Susan’s quilt, I’ve been thinking about fasting since last fall.  Actually I’ve been beating myself up over it a bit, thinking I’ve been bad to my body.  (Bad Brain, Bad Body) It might be the change of season, the warmer weather that got me motivated, but what ever it is, for the first time in my life, I’m doing a three day juice fast.

This is day one,  I’m three hours into it and so far, so good.  I know three hours isn’t a long time, but  I haven’t yet had one craving for  Barbara’s Cheese Puffs (which have become a staple in my diet since discovering them at the Co-op a few months ago).  That’s really good for me.  I don’t know what will happen when Jon comes home and starts smelling up the house with all those good food  smells.   But I’m just taking this one day at a time, as the saying goes.  I’m not making any promises, but I really want to get all those books back on the shelf.

Lulu and Fanny And Me

April 9th, 2014

lulu and fannyA shadow self portrait with Lulu and Fanny this morning.  All the donkeys wanted to be brushed, the morning song birds were singing and  the mallard couple were in the swampy part of the pasture, the hens are hanging out on the back porch.  No lambs yet, but last night I heard the peepers for the first time.  Spring is finally here.