I just don’t know

Sometimes I make something and I just know it’s good.  Sometimes I think it’s great and I get really excited over it, a creative rush.  Other times I just know it’s bad and throw the whole thing in the garbage.  And sometimes, I just don’t know.

The first time I tried my free motion foot sewing machine, I found myself  unconsciously drawing a self portrait.  It was tiny, but there was a figure in a dress, a dog, a flower and a building that looked like my studio.  At that moment, I was in my studio with Freida and full grown sunflowers outside my window.  It was the most natural thing for me to do, something I didn’t even have to think about.

But I left the idea behind and only came back to it months later.  When I made my first Streaming piece I wasn’t really sure about it.  It was interesting and I liked making it, but it was so familiar to me I didn’t think it was anything special.  For some reason I kept doing them.  Then people started to tell me how much they liked them and I sold all three pieces that I made for the first show in the Pig Barn Gallery.  So I was encouraged, and have made more, with the idea of showing them all together.  But through out it all, I continue to have my doubts.

So now I’ve taken my uncertainty a step further by making a Streaming piece into a pillow.  And every time I look at it I think, “I just don’t know”.  But I also know, I’m going to make more. Maybe I’ll keep making them until, that nagging feeling inside of me, goes away.  That feeling that says, “there’s something here, you’re just not seeing it.”   That feeling that keeps me going, that wants to know.

17 thoughts on “I just don’t know

  1. I like it very much Maria!!! What you’ve left out in variety of color you have more than made up for in stitching. I love looking for the words and, from them, the meaning. MOST Excellent. Thank you!!

  2. It could be you do not see the functionality or comfort in this streaming work. Perhaps sets of something such as potholders with dish towels bearing the same theme. Heck you might even make Jon a set with apron. Keep him bare foot and in the kitchen.

  3. Hi Maria, This is great! I do think pillows are a great new thing to craft. They’ll sell so fast at the gallery show your head will spin! I love the window here of course, and the anatomy of this woman. Her female part, and especially her big heart! This is you. 🙂

  4. I know! This piece does make a most interesting pillow, somewhat like a diary of your thoughts during the time it took you to create it. At least that’s how I interpret it. I find it fascinating, this streaming – it’s my first exposure to this art form. Such an intricate composite of thoughts and images and ideas!

    For me, when I turn the pillow a quarter turn clockwise it seems somehow more balanced, and brings me back to “greatness at my fingertips”. Your fingertips, Maria. I see your creative spirit sparkling there. You seem to have expressed and shared a part of yourself in this work. Lovely!

    And I didn’t miss your Ginghers in there either. 🙂

  5. It’s marvelous! I am curious, just how large is it? Enjoy your reappearance of cacti and stars; the figures are amazing! Wonderful colors and I love the corner accents!!

  6. I love these streaming pieces. They capture interest and imagination. I have never been able to do this myself but when I get time again I’m going to try because of these.

  7. I think Grampy has the right idea! I just laughed myself silly at “keep Jon barefoot and in the kitchen”! I bet he would look great in an apron you made just for him, Maria. Maybe some matching hotmits!

  8. Maria, what you wrote made me think of the “Waters of March” which is a Brazilian song composed by Antonio Carlos Jobim. The tune is a collection of words, formed to create a poetic comparison in rhyme (I’m quoting the liner notes) meter and meaning, chameleon in the nursery rhyme melody simplicity that later covers the world as a soft drink jingle. The thing is, that long sewing line creating pictures invokes this song in my head. Strange how something you created would do that!

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