Last night Jon “settled” into his new hospital bed in a new hospital. He was transferred there to have bypass surgery. Yesterday it was only a possibility, suddenly we learn to expect what we never imagined a few days ago. Life has become about waiting and the unknown. It’s strange to be walking around hospital hallways with Jon walking an IV line on a pole like a dog on a leash. And it should be strange. It’s not something I ever want to get used to. I want the whole experience to remain like something from a sci fi novel. A blip in reality. We humans can adjust so quickly, sometimes too quickly. Suddenly life has shrunk to the necessities. Being able to lay next to each other in a hospital bed is like a trip to Disney. Has it really only been two days?
And we’re lucky, so lucky, this is something that will end, and when it’s over Jon is going to feel better than he has in a long, time. It’s like what Jon says about fear. This is a space to cross. Ultimately it will make our lives better. Sure you can always walk across the street and get hit by a bus. That part doesn’t change, there’s always that and sometime it’s closer than at other times. We’ve stepped through a threshold and there’s another threshold on at the other end of all of this. Right now it’s like a mirage, all wavy and in the distance. And I’m not saying I know exactly what’s on the other side, but Jon and I are going there together.