My friend Jackie gave me the quilt. She came to the Open House with three old quilts. This one was the most faded and worn. I hung it on my wall immediately. I was drawn to how subtle the colors are. The soft texture. The places where the batting shows and the backing behind it.
I knew I wanted to do something with it.
This morning when I went into my studio, I decided I would draw directly on it with marker. Then I tried to do something else. As much as I wanted to draw on the quilt I was a little apprehensive. It was so beautiful just as it was and I was afraid to ruin it. I started working on a wall hanging, something I’d been thinking about, but found I couldn’t get it right, and it wasn’t holding my interest. I was getting discouraged and thought of taking a walk, but knew that what I really wanted to do was make something.
So I got out my black and started to draw.
The other thing that happened at the Open House is that my sister Fran, who was selling her mini gardens, gave me back the book Women Who Run With the Wolves by Clarissa Pinkola Estes. I had given it to her to read years ago. Lately the book has been coming to mind and I was thinking of getting a copy of it. Then there was Fran giving it back to me. I had given her a bunch of books and told her to pass them along when she was done with them. And she had with the other books, but she had a feeling I might want this one back, and she was so right.
So, I started reading it. And the introduction was all about Wild Woman. Who lives inside all of us, but is often buried deep, dominated by domesticity and societies demands. Estes says, we get glimpses of her when we hear a song, or see a piece of art, or read a poem that moves us. And for a moment she emerges. We long for Wild Woman and sometimes we find her inside of ourselves and allow her to emerge.
So when I picked up my marker this morning I drew my I’m Alive Goddess first. I added the wide open eye just below her belly button. The Hara awake. The place where our life force and instincts live.
I’m not done with this yet. I know I want to add more color with fabric and markers. I’m not sure what else I’ll do.
Making this released something in me. I loved working so big and loved the freedom of drawing with markers. And the freedom of drawing on makers on this beautiful hand stitched quilt. There’s an irreverence about it, that speaks to my own Wild Woman. And, I think of the woman who hand stitched the quilt and if she ever knew her Wild Woman.