“I was thinking”, I said to Jon,” that if you died, I would put a donation button on my blog.”
It’s not that Jon and I think about death all the time, but we do talk very openly about it, maybe more often than many people. Not in a morbid way, in the way of trying to understand death and how we feel about it.
We talk about it in a practical way too. Of course anything can happen, I might die years before Jon, but he is 17 years older than me, so there’s a good chance he’ll die first.
Just yesterday Jon wrote on his blog about how he’s leaving Bedlam Farm Journal to me when he dies.
He spoke to Chris at Mannix Marketing, our web designers, to direct his viewers to my blog. Unlike the idea of us paying for life insurance for Jon (I’d rather us spend the money together) I like this idea of Jon passing his blog onto me. Practically it makes sense and it also fits into the parameters of our creative life together.
Our blogs in some ways are the same. They both embrace the philosophy of Bedlam Farm, the animals and creativity. But the way we express our lives is very different.
So when I told Jon where my idea came from to ask for monetary support for my blog, it wasn’t shocking. I think what surprised Jon more, was my finally being able to see myself as a writer and one good enough to be paid for my work.
I’ve never wanted to ask for financial support for my blog because I’ve always seen it a way to sell my art. And it is. But over the ten years that I’ve had it, its evolved into something more. And I’ve evolved too.
I’ve been writing almost every day for ten years.
In the beginning, just thinking of writing on my blog used to make me very anxious.
But about a year or so ago, Jon said something to me that changed that. He told me to trust my writing the way I trust making my art. So after years of practicing and gaining confidence in my writing and embodying Jon’s words, writing has become not something to dread and be anxious about, but another creative medium for my self-expression.
As I have encouraged Jon in his visual art, he has encouraged my in my writing.
There were many times when I was having trouble writing a piece that was important to me and I was grateful to be living with a writer who is not only good at teaching, but really wanted to help me write well.
Historically that has not always been the case with male writers and their wives.
I will admit, I still have a hard time saying I’m a writer, but it’s just as hard for me to deny when I see how important my writing has become to me. When I know what a big part of my blog and creative life it is.
The thought that came after having the idea to put a donation button on my blog if Jon died, was…Why wait till he dies?
Because I was thinking that if Jon died I’d have to make more money to survive on the farm. But why didn’t I want to make more money now, for both of us? Was I just expecting Jon to pick up the slack for what I couldn’t afford?
That’s not who I want to be.
The more I thought about it, the more I could see that I’m spending more time writing and taking videos and photos. That my blog isn’t just about my art anymore. It’s about my life too.
The thing is, they are all one.
There are no boundaries between my life and my art. They undulate and fold into each other like a stream and its eddies. An organic flow, circling back and moving on.
I tell my story and express my ideas and thoughts with my fiber art, my writing, my photo’s and videos. My blog is the place where it all comes together…then flows out to who ever choses to receive it.
I know there are lots of people who read and enjoy my blog who don’t buy my art.
And that’s wonderful. I love the idea of people being able to see my art and get what it can from it, without having to own it.
But since my blog is now about more than just selling my art, I like the idea of providing an easy way for people to support my work in another way.
I know I like to be able to give some money, usually five or ten dollars, when I read something on-line that has been helpful or has meaning for me. Websites that I use a lot, I like to pay for if possible. Not every time I use them, not when my bank account is low, but when I can.
This is the way I’m thinking about how support for my blog would work. If you enjoy looking at my art, but don’t want to own it, if my writing has meaning for you or my videos make you smile, or if you want to follow the lives of the dogs and other animals here, than you can support it all easily whenever you are compelled to.
As most of you know, just last month I recreated my blog. So it’s now easier to see and use on smart phone and computers. (It’s also expensive, it cost about $4,000).
The writing and photos are larger, comments and emails are easier to leave and my Etsy Shop is easier to access. With the simpler format of the my blog there are less distractions and no more ads.
My blog is more than just a place to sell my art. It’s an extension of me. It’s where I go to work out my thoughts and ideas, it where I go to hear what my readers have to say. It’s how I communicate with the world.
There’s one more change I’m going to make to my blog. On the header, under the words Full Moon Fiber Art, I’m going to stitch the words, My Art, My Life. Because this is what my blog truly is.
I’m working on the details to make this happen. I’ll keep you updated on the progress. And let me know what you think.