Birch bark, pine needle and the purple thread from my Purple Thread Video.  I found the birch bark with the holes in it on a walk in the woods,  then picked up the pine needle.  On the way back home I looked for and found the purple tread I made the video of  last week and untangled it from the same weed it was caught on in the video.  I took it home, put it all together and now it’s on the altar in my studio.

Last night I had the worse nightmare I  ever remember having.  Jon woke me up from it.  My heart was pounding and I could hardly catch my breath.   I couldn’t distinguish reality from the nightmare.

It was so terrifying that it stayed with me all day.  That’s why I haven’t blogged until now.  I just couldn’t.  It was like I was recovering from a massive panic attach.  I felt emotionally bruised and battered.

Now I’m feeling it by being exhausted.  But I also feel like my heart is still beating too fast, even though I know it isn’t.

I’ll probably write about the nightmare.  Maybe tomorrow or the next day.  Because of my extreme reaction to it, I know it’s important to remember,  to try and understand what my subconscious is trying to tell me.

I did get back to sleep eventually,  with Jon’s reassurance and after watching an episode of  Queer Eye For The Straight Guy.  It was the perfect show to ease me back to sleep, comforting, fun, light and entertaining.


11 thoughts on “Nightmare

  1. They are terrifying. I haven’t suffered one in a long time but I remembered what frightened me most was that stuff could live in my head. I’m grateful my mind seems to be able to be peaceful most of the time. The most helpful thing a favorite meditation teacher said once ; “remember they are just thoughts.”

    1. That’s good advice Jane, although it seemed like much more than thoughts at the time. I am figuring it out. I know the nightmare will ultimately be revealing.

  2. How wonderful Jon was there to help you through. These events are so terrifying. Wishing you clarity and peace with whatever sense may or may not be, and sunshine to soothe your soul.

  3. When this photo first popped up, I thought it was a face! Or the remains of animal. Certainly made me pay attention. I like it a lot.

  4. Oh, I hope my previous comment did not add to the stress of your nightmare! I certainly did not mean to be insensitive. I think I spent so much time staring at the photo that I only now just read the entire post. Hoping you’re feeling better.

    1. Not at all Barbara. It’s hard to know what the picture is of if you didn’t find it in the woods as I did. It does look like both a face or remains of an animal.

  5. Maria: regarding the nightmare, better out than in.
    Whatever confluence of physical, mental, spiritual that gave you those very bad dreams,
    may they not come together again.
    I would say an affirmation to myself before going to sleep about having a peaceful sleep.

  6. I have very realistic dreams full of color, but I’ve had five nightmares that were so vivid they caused physical responses. They have lingered in memory past their shelf expiration date; strange but no longer frightening. I hope you’re feeling much better and that you’re dreams tonight are peaceful. Perhaps something wonderfully creative or insightful will be revealed.

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