Making Clay Roses At The Mansion. The Sadness Of Endings

 

The clay roses we made today

We made roses at The Mansion today.

We used DAS modeling clay.  It’s soft so easier to mold.  It air dries and can be painted.  But the clay is naturally white so a white rose would work too.

I didn’t think to take pictures as we worked.  I was too busy going from person to person helping them.  There were two aids helping too, but making roses was not as easy as I thought it would be.

I tried to make it simple, but I think a part of it is that the people in the class are used to using markers and pencils and paper, but not working with clay. Not using their hands in that way.

Which is one of there reasons I brought the clay to The Mansion today.  I love how clay feels in my hands, I enjoy working it, and I thought maybe some of the people there would too.

And some of them did.  But I also understand for people who don’t like the way it feels, it’s no fun.  So Susan opted out but everyone else made at least one rose.

When we were done I curled the end of some wire and stuck it through the flower as a stem.

It was a good class, but I felt a sadness at The Mansion today.

I think partly because some of the people I’m used to seeing in my class weren’t there.  And I’m not sure they are coming back.  There were two new people at the table who I was glad to meet. I hope they show up next month, again.

I’ve been volunteering at The Mansion for years and people often leave or die and I don’t get to say goodbye.  I’m sad and miss them when they do.  But today it hit me differently.  As if the people who are gone were being replaced by the new people.

As if they were interchangeable.

Maybe it just the years of volunteering at The Mansion catching up with me.  Maybe for the first time I’ve allowed myself to feel what I closed myself off to before.

The inevitable sadness of endings.

What I need to do is allow myself to feel the sadness through and through.  Then start thinking of what we will do in our class in June.

4 thoughts on “Making Clay Roses At The Mansion. The Sadness Of Endings

  1. I have always thought that sort of work must take an emotional toll. Your and Jon’s contributions are so generous and it’s obvious how much good you do, how much joy you bring to the Mansion.

    1. I think of the people who work there Carolyn and how hard it is to do that day after day. I get to enjoy it in a way they don’t.

  2. Beautifully said, Maria. I remember when I did therapy dog work at hospice and assisted facility and this same sadness. It’s hard not to get attached. But in the end, I know all those experiences made me a better human being for it.

    1. You’re so right Barb. That’s the other part of it, what it does for us. And without that, I don’t think I could do it.

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