Our Winter Solstice Bon Fire

The brighter the fire blazed the darker the night around us was.  With no moon and few stars there was little to see beyond the immediate glow of the fire.

I saved the cardboard that I had put over the gardens for the winter and used it to start the fire.  The wood is still from the maple that fell two years ago along with a few old broken cedar shingles from the house repairs this summer.

Also in the fire was one of my old potholders that I had used up, a piece of paper with the words forgive forgive forgive (a request from a friend), the old wicker chair from the back porch and a cast iron frying pan.

It was dusk when I lit the fire, Jon sat with Zinnia and I stood close to the flames to watch it.  And for those first moments, I felt a connection to the people before me who have for so long,  lit ceremonial fires on the longest night.

If I have a god it is nature.  During this time of year with all its holidays, the Winter Solstice has the most meaning for me.  It also makes the most sense to me (lighting a fire when it is darkest).  But I have found, that the more connected I am to the natural world, the more I feel drawn to celebrate the first day of winter by having a bon fire.

It’s the end of the season’s cycle and hope for the days to come.

I don’t know how many years we’ve been doing it, not more than five I’d guess, but it has become a tradition at the farm.  One that Jon and I both feel strongly about.  Jon can’t stay out in the cold as long as I can, but he also wouldn’t miss me lighting the fire and sitting for with me and Zinnia (it was too cold for Fate) even if he can’t stay till the embers are smoldering.

It’s an ancient tradition that we have adopted, that we have made it our own.  As much as I tried over the years to wish the holidays away, to try to ignore them, I wasn’t completely able too.  There are reminders of them in so many places, it’s even a feeling in the air.

But the truth is I feel something inside of  this time of year. As if there is something special about it.  I don’t know if I would if not surround by reminders, but  having the Solstice to celebrate gives me a place to put those feelings.

And because Jon and I are creating the ritual, we get to do it the way we want without obligation and expectation.

I think most the things we burned last night are self-explanatory.  But let me tell you about the frying pan.

Over a year ago it, we burned what we were cooking in it.  It gave off so much smoke,  Jon grabbed the pan off the stove and brought it outside.  He put it on the table on the back porch.  But when it cooled off, the pan had a coat of paint melted on to the bottom of it from the table.

I don’t remember what made me think to burn the paint off in the bon fire.  But it sat in the barn, for a year,  waiting for last night.

This morning the Winter Solstice embers and the cast iron pan were cold and the paint was gone.I washed the pan and seasoned it in the oven with olive oil.  It looks brand new.

You can see more photos of the bon fire on Jon’s blog.  Click here.