Napkin Notebook 2: Delilah’s Own Recipe

Delilah's Own Recipe
Delilah’s Own Recipe

Remember when Sinead O’Connor shaved her head and it was controversial?  Or when Mia Farrow cut her hair (really short for the time) during the filming of Rosemary’s Baby and they used it in the film which, to me, made the movie even more disturbing. There are many religions where women aren’t allowed to cut their hair or show their hair.  My own mother feels that a certain point in a woman’s life (I’m not sure exactly when it is)  she should no longer have long hair.

There’s something powerful about women’s hair.  So many issues of control seem to surround it. Covering it up, cutting it, putting it up, letting it down.

Today when I was meditating I saw a woman cutting her own hair, holding up the shears in frustration and as solution.  There was an element of magic to it,transformation in the sacrifice.  And an element of control in her decision to do as she pleased with her own body.

This didn’t come out exactly the way I wanted it to.  Her expression is a bit more bleak than I planned, and I’m thinking it might work better without the reflection in the mirror, just a blank mirror.  I may try it again tomorrow and see what happens.

13 thoughts on “Napkin Notebook 2: Delilah’s Own Recipe

  1. The thinking was that when you were 30, you should cut your hair short And so I did. But I never felt like myself with short hair and grew it back, always after with various lengths around or past my shoulders, with layers and all one length … Now I’m 67 with silvery white hair and its way past shoulder length and I have bangs .. and as long as I feel like “me” it’s going to stay long…. There were lots of rules back then, wonderful that they no longer apply.

    1. I’m always wanted long hair, especially I think it beautiful when white or gray, but my hair doesn’t grow very long anymore. Yours sounds just right Elaine.

  2. Love your quilted Delilah design, Maria. I do like the reflection in the mirror, just my opinion. As for hair, you are right about it’s power. I grew up hearing that a woman’s hair is her “crowning glory”. My hair style and length were always a source of contention between my mother and me. I always wanted it long. She wanted it short and curly. I’m 60 now and still like it long!

  3. I just had my hair cut short on Saturday! It’s been shoulder length or longer for the last 20 years, and I was so sick of dealing with it in this heat. I’ve wanted to do it for a while, but was afraid of not looking feminine or looking older. I was a little worried about whether my husband would like it as he’s never seen me with short hair, but he says he likes it. 🙂

  4. Dear Maria, You seem to bring up topics that are hidden inside of myself so deeply that I haven’t thought them thru in YEARS! Thank you for doing this!! After reading what you wrote about hair, I realized that about 1980 all the women I knew had started going to a hairdresser to get the new long layered look. I tried that about 3 times and just could not bring myself to give the control of my hair over to someone else who would do a cookie cutter “do” so I could look just like everyone else. I have been cutting, perming, coloring my own hair ever since. And no matter how it comes out, at least I DID IT TO MYSELF!! MY HAIR, MY CONTROL! The women in my mother’s age group (80-90) all went to the beauty shop every week for their wash and curl and their monthly perm, and all had hair that was the SAME! Annie

  5. i’m smiling because I am the reverse. I have fine, limp, straight hair and after years of keeping it ca shoulder length and trying to wave it I began to let it grow and grow. I love it now. I wear it plaited around my head, my grandmother’s style, and it is as if my whole persona is changed. I’m in my 70s and everybody’s grandmother! People stop me on the streets of our little city, asking for directions and smile at me in queues saying “I love the way you wear your hair”.

  6. How funny. My Mom has that same belief. I always felt she thought that cutting your hair short was part of growing up. I’m 51 and still wear mine past my shoulders.

  7. I also like the reflection in the mirror. Funny, my mother didn’t care about the length of my hair but a friend of same age, now 70, thought once you were a parent you hair should be short. Maybe so you could devote more time to your family ?? Only guessing.

  8. Oh, my. You’ve certainly hit a ‘raw nerve ending’ with me. I think my hair has only been short for about fifteen minutes of my life simply because it grows faster than kudzu!! [Hairdressers are costly.] And now that I’m in the ‘matronly’ stage of life, I am always amazed at the reactions and comments from people who see my ‘hair down’ as opposed to the usual twist/knot I keep it in for convenience.
    I’ve donated four pony tails worth averaging 18-20 inches long to Locks of Love over the years; now that it’s graying, they don’t want it. I currently keep it about waist length and when people ask ‘how do you grow it so long’ I can only reply “Hirsute crazy genes!” 🙂

  9. No, no, no envy allowed! Just like everything else we discovered with connection, we each want want we don’t have. I always lusted after those sassy, cute hair cuts or later, the spiral curls [because mine was straight]. Hair is a deep subject!

    1. It seems to me everyone always wants the hair they don’t have. I’m finally getting that my hair just wants to be short and finding the best way to keep it that way. Finally!! (although I’ll admit, I still crave a long thick braid down my back.)

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