Silly me. So much for surrendering.
I had lots of plans for the things I would do today, but it took me all day just to pack up five orders of dryer balls and roving.
I’m not sure what I was thinking, maybe I’m just hopeful or delusional.
Feeling as if I got so little done, I’m questioning why I’m so tired. But I know if I were talking to a friend, I’d be able to explain their fatigue. It’s so much easier to see what’s happening from the outside looking in. Still, all I really need to do is think about it a little and I understand how draining, physically and emotionally the past two days have been.
Today Jon got his Sleep Apnea mask and afterward, we were both feeling it was all a lot to deal with in such a short amount of time.
I keep thinking of my friends, one whose husband has dementia another whose husband just died. It keeps things in perspective for me, and I am grateful.
But I also have to remind myself that those truths don’t diminish what I’m feeling at the moment.
My head spins with all I need to do. But need is relative. What was important yesterday is not so much today.
Tonight after dinner we called our friend Sue Silverstein. She knows hardship and so the importance of laughter. “I’m not complaining,” Jon said, “I’m just venting to a friend.” It’s only been two days, but I feel like I’ve been putting ice on and off of Jon’s foot for weeks. “Wine helps,” Sue told me, as I looked into my empty wine glass.
These past couple of days have been just like the rest of life, with its ups and downs, only intensified. Sue helped us up lighten up and when we got off the phone we both felt better.
I was grateful for Sue’s friendship before today, but it’s times like this that strengthen those bonds. Another thing to be grateful for.