It’s been on my mind for a while. Then I started to hear the voices reaffirming my thoughts.
They came from people who know animals, people I trust. Our farrier Ken, called her a pasture pony and both Todd who fixes our fences and our friend Ed Gully talked of how horses need work.
Since I started to get to know horses, through visiting Blue Star Equiculture, then taking lessons from Eli Norman and getting my pony Chloe, I’ve come to believe that horses are our companions on this earth and they need to do their work to be fulfilled.
Now what their work is may vary depending on the horse and the relationship they have with their person. Lately I’ve been thinking that Chloe isn’t ready for retirement, ready to be a pasture pony. That she still has work to do in this world, work that she’s really good at.
As far as pony’s go, she a really good and affectionate pony. With the right person, someone who knows how to work with horses, she’ll do what you ask most of the time and willingly.
I love Chloe. I’ve already learned so much from her about horses and about myself. And one of the things I’ve come to see is that I’m not interesting in riding and working and spending time with horses the way some people are.
I’ve been thinking that Chloe should be with someone who wants all she has to offer.
When Jon and I started taking about this idea, he immediately thought of a family we know who have always had horses and love them and have a young boy who he thought might be a good fit for Chloe.
As soon as Jon said it, it made sense to me. So I went to the barnyard and while brushing Chloe I visualize the little boy and his mother, telling Chloe what I was thinking.
The next day when I went to brush her, I emptied my mind and listened. The idea came to me that Chloe, only 20 years old, was not ready to just live in our pasture for the rest of her life. That she had much to offer and that she could teach the right person, adult or child so much by being with them. And that her life would be enriched by the experience too.
I began to see myself as the person in her life, between being rescued by Ken and Eli Norman and the next person she was meant to be with. That our work here was done and it was time for her to move on to the next person.
But it’s not that I just want to get rid of her. Not at all. I’d keep Chloe for the rest of her life, if there wasn’t a better place for her to go. But if there is a place for her, a place that would be fulfilling and stimulating and of course loving, I’d want her to be there.
The thought of me finding such a place for her, makes me happy and sad at the same time. I’ve really connected with her and grown to love her in a way I don’t love any of the my other animals. But that’s also why I feel like I know her so well. And that there may be a better place for her. That I may not be giving her everything she really needs.
I don’t know if I’ll find that place for Chloe. But I do feel like it’s out there somewhere. I can see it and feel it. And ultimately I want whats best for her, precisely because I do love her.