Thinking About Chloe and Me

November 27th, 2016


Lulu and Chloe

Lulu and Chloe

It’s been on my mind for a while.  Then I started to hear the voices reaffirming my thoughts.

They came from people who know animals, people I trust.  Our farrier Ken, called her a pasture pony and both Todd who fixes our fences and our friend Ed Gully talked of how horses need work.

Since I started to get to know horses, through visiting Blue Star Equiculture, then taking lessons from Eli Norman and getting my pony Chloe, I’ve come to believe that horses are our companions on this earth and they need to do their work to be fulfilled.

Now what their work is may vary depending on the horse and the relationship they have with their person.   Lately I’ve been thinking that Chloe isn’t ready for retirement, ready to be a pasture pony.    That she still has work to do in this world, work that she’s really good at.

As far as pony’s go, she a really good and affectionate pony.  With the right person, someone who knows how to work with horses, she’ll  do what you ask most of the time and willingly.

I love Chloe.  I’ve already learned so much from her about horses and about myself.  And one of the things I’ve come to see is that I’m not interesting in riding and working and spending time with horses the way some people are.

I’ve been thinking that Chloe should be with someone who wants all she has to offer.

When Jon and I started taking about this idea, he immediately thought of a family we know who have always had horses and love them and have a young boy who he thought might be a good fit for Chloe.

As soon as Jon said it, it made sense to me.  So I went to the barnyard and while brushing Chloe I visualize the little boy and his mother, telling  Chloe what I was thinking.

The next day when I went to brush her, I emptied my mind and listened.  The idea came to me that Chloe, only 20 years old, was not ready to just live in our pasture for the rest of her life.  That she had much to offer and that she could teach the right person, adult or child so much by being with them.  And that her life would be enriched by the experience too.

I began to see myself as the person in her life, between  being rescued by Ken and Eli Norman and the next person she was meant to be with.  That our work here was done and it was time for her to move on to the next person.

But it’s not that I just want to get rid of her.  Not at all.  I’d keep Chloe for the rest of her life, if there wasn’t a better place for her to go.  But if there is a place for her, a  place that would be fulfilling and stimulating and of course loving, I’d want her to be there.

The thought of me finding such a place for her, makes me happy and sad at the same time.  I’ve really connected with her and grown to love her in a way I don’t love any of the my other animals.  But that’s also why I feel like I know her so well.  And that there may be a better place for her.  That I may not be giving her everything she really needs.

I don’t know if I’ll find that place for Chloe.  But I do feel like it’s out there somewhere.  I can see it and feel it.  And ultimately I want whats best for her, precisely because I do love her.



Napping With Cats

November 26th, 2016
Frieda And Minnie

Frieda And Minnie

I’ve slept with dogs before but not so much cats.  Lestat,  my second dog, a Doberman mix who was born under a car, the runt of the liter, would nudge me when I was in bed.  I’d lift the blanket and he’d crawl under.  By the time I woke up he’d  have pushed me to the edge of the bed.

Frieda, though bigger than Lestat, knew how to make herself small. Never cold with her thick Shepard coat, she’d curl up at the bottom of the bed and I hardly knew she was there.

All my cats have always lived outside. Wild things not the type to snuggle and cuddle. Until Minnie and now Flo started coming in the house. It’s been a few years now but I only just realized how much nicer it is to nap with a cat.

Our cats don’t go upstairs into the bedroom, but if I lay down in the living room one of them and somethings both of them, find a place next to me.   They wind themselves into a perfect oval filling the negative spaces my body creates on the couch.

Knowing they’re there, just feeling the warmth and pressure is enough.  But then they purr. The sound and vibration like a rocking lullaby.  And when they settle in, they’re there for good.  Even now as  I write this I can feel the sound of their purring tickling my heart.

I’ve heard that closest relative to the  domestic cat is the tiger.  And what’s safer than a sleeping tiger.

Happy Thanksgiving

November 26th, 2016
Lulu and Fanny enjoying their Thanksgiving hay

Lulu and Fanny

I wrote this post on Thanksgiving morning and only now realized I didn’t hit the “publish” button.  So it’s a little late, but here’s my wishes to you for a good Thanksgiving day….

I sprinkled some carrots and apple pieces in the animals hay this morning, and gave the chickens each their own egg.   A Thanksgiving treat.   Jon and I are off to an Inn in Vermont for the night.  We started our holiday early by going to the movies last night (saw “Certain Women”) and sleeping late this morning.  Hope you all get some extra eggs and carrots to make your day special.

Bedlam Farm Tote Bags, Each With An Original Drawing On It, For Sale

November 25th, 2016
Tree And Donkey

Tree And Donkey

This past week I made some Bedlam Farm Tote Bags but haven’t had a chance to put them up for sale.  So now, here they are.  The Tote bags are made by Ecobags and are 15″x19″.  Each tote bag is unique and has one of my original drawings on it. I make my drawings with permanent markers.  My Bedlam Farm Tote Bags are $48 each + $8 shipping.  If you see one you like, just let me know.  I take checks and paypal and you can email me at

Making Magic at Bedlam Farm

Making Magic at Bedlam Farm

Bird with Tree

Bird Tree


Singing Donkeys

Singing Donkeys Sold


Tree Home

Bringing The Outside In

November 24th, 2016


We were still in bed when I reached out the window and broke the icicle off the roof.

It was much longer than I thought and immediately started to melt in my warm hand, the icy water running down my arm.

I showed it to Jon.  Suddenly we had a two and a half-foot long icicle in bed with us.

His reaction was quiet, not sure what to make of it.  Later he would say living with me was like being in that roller coaster park we went to once.  Up and down, you just never knew what might happen next.

I broke off  about three inches from the thin,  pointed end of the icicle and put it in my mouth. Then    tossed  the rest of it out the window into the snow.   It was so sharp, it could have easily cut my tongue.  Sucking on it, I drank the ice-cold water as it melted in my morning mouth, soothing my dry throat.   Bringing the outside in.

This was all only possible because Jay took out the old wooden screen, which had been painted onto the house for years,  to use as a template to make a wooden winter storm window.  In the years past I hung an old quilt over the window to keep the wind and cold air out.  The same way people used to hang tapestries or cover their walls with newspaper to keep the cold from coming through.

It’s because there was no screen on the window, and the outside was only a pane of glass away, that made me think to bring the icicle into our bedroom.  Once Jay fits the storm window in place it won’t be as easy to get to the outside from our bed.  We’ll be warmer, but I’ll no longer be able to reach out my window and bring the outside in.


Win One Of Jane McMillen’s Chicken Pincushions

November 23rd, 2016
My own Chicken Pincushion by Jane McMillen

My own Chicken Little Pincushion by Jane McMillen

I’ve been at my Post Office when the baby chicks come in.  You can hear them peeping from the lobby.  Boxes of baby chicks sent in the mail, waiting to be picked up to go to their new home.  A couple of times there was even a rooster, crowing at the wrong time of day.

But my chicken was quiet and  delivered to my mailbox.   It’s a Chicken Pincushion sent to me from my friend and  it’s maker Jane McMillen.

Jane insisted on giving me one after I sold out the 25 she made for  the Bedlam Farm Open House.  Now she’s made about thirty more, in a bunch of different colors and patterns and is giving one away on her website Little House Home Arts.  All you have to do is leave a comment on her blog, Little House Home Arts.  (on Jane’s blog, not mine, if you leave a comment on my blog you won’t be entered in the contest and will miss your chance to win!)

I love this little chicken (or Chicken Little as Jane calls.  You can read all about it here) and know I’ll never stick a pin in her, even though she’s stuffed with crushed walnut shells to keep my pins and needles sharp, and it’s what she was made for.   I guess it’s the same way some people feel about my potholders.

Jane will choose a winner two days after Thanksgiving and let us all know who it is.  And if you don’t win, you can always buy one of Jane’s Chicken Pincushions from her.  You can see them all here on her blog or click here to  all her other beautiful work on Etsy.

Some of Jane's Chicken Pincushions

Some of Jane’s Chicken Pincushions…

...and a few more.

…and a few more.

Dragon Fly Quilt

November 22nd, 2016


I was doing yoga in my studio when I saw the dragonfly fabric on my shelf.  I interrupted my practice to pull it out.   Soon after I saw the yellow and deep red pieces that I would put above and below with the dragonflies.

Those yellow and red pieces are handmade although I can’t remember where they’re from.  Someone sent them and other fabric to me a while ago.  The woman who sent them is a geologist and did some traveling.  I wish I remember more about it and her.

From the beginning the quilt had a feeling of ritual about it.   The symmetry was unavoidable.  Whenever I tried to deviate from it, it didn’t work.

So I let it be what it wanted to be.

Throughout making this quilt, there were many times when I had to leave it and come back to it.  It’s not an easy one.   Tonight, I got stuck again.  I know I’m trying too hard.  I want to get it resolved and I’m having a hard time being patient.

But I did step away from it and worked on something else for a while.

It’s bugging me though, like something I can’t remember, or a puzzle missing a piece.

Flock of Sheep

November 21st, 2016


From left to right, that’s Griselle half out of the picture, Suzy up front, and Rosemary and Kim behind her.  Zelda, Socks, Pumpkin, Liam and Biddy behind him.  The only sheep not in the picture is Izzy.  She was probably in the pole barn.

By looking at the picture, you’d think I’d asked them to pose for it.

Lulu and Fanny Enjoying A Sunflower

November 21st, 2016

There was one very big sunflower still in the ground.  The seeds had all been eaten by birds, but I knew the animals would love to snack on it, especially since the ground was covered with snow.   Chloe wasn’t interested in it.  Lulu kept the sheep away,  and she and Fanny enjoyed it from the flower to the roots.

Good Monday Morning From Bedlam Farm 11/21/16

November 21st, 2016

A snowy morning and the latch froze on the gate.  As I was trying to get it open I dropped my phone and had to scramble to reach under the gate to get it, worried that Chloe might step on it.  It did get an unusual image of Chloe while it was on the ground.   Not a typical Monday Morning Video and an unpolished video.